.jpg "Gaget at Tignay")
Everyone wears confidence differently. No one notices at first, but with constant habits of improvement, you'll never fake it again.
For some who's loud and proud, it is obvious. Those with unshakable ease, they immediately feel like they command the room as they enter. It’s quite usual and you notice them through observation. They seem to have calculated eye contact, neat notes, and has steady breath during a presentation as if they don't fret.
But if you’re reading this, you probably tried faking confidence. You might have nodded even when you’re unsure. You keep your voice steady even when your thoughts are all over the place.
Setting aside that reasons, you're reading it right now because you're tired doing that over and over and you just want to know what it takes to be really confident without faking it.
The twist is that confidence isn’t always built in huge and dramatic changes. Sometimes, it grows subtly in habits that others rarely see. So, here are 6 subtle habits which may not make headlines in motivational speeches, but they’ll evoke something inside you.
It's not all at once, but over time in a steady manner.
{tocify} $title={Table of Contents}
1. Accomplishing things even the small ones
Either replying to one email or showing up in class, there's a feeling of fulfillment and a boost in confidence regardless if others see it as minor or almost irrelevant.
Just make sure you don't let unfinished things pile up in your brain because once they do, it bothers you and it affects the way you handle things. And every time you finish something regardless if it's tiny or not, tell yourself that:
- “I can follow through.”
- “I can do what I put in my mind."
- “I can depend on myself.”
Affirmations like these build a subtle kind of trust, which resonates well with building confidence.
2. Walking inside rooms like you belong
As you enter the room, don’t rush to the corner seat. Instead, take a second to breathe and compose yourself. Remember that you're not intruding as you're part of the group.
You don’t have to dominate the space just to make yourself feel confident. You must not fill your mind with negative thoughts as well. Just chin up and smile as you walk.
The brain catches up with the body. So, walk like one and be proud because eventually, you will.
3. Saying “I don’t know” without a doubt on your tone
What some students rarely talks about is that the most confident students aren’t the ones who know everything. But rather, it's the ones who do not know everything but has the ability to say they don't know something. Why? because it let them do actions to know more.
The next time you're asked about something foreign to you, do not freeze up, just say what you truly feel and do not be afraid to respond with:
- “I’m not sure about that yet.”
- “Can you help me understand?”
When you're unsure, just be honest. When you want answers, do not let your curiosity be buried down. Because being teachable is one step to becoming confident.
You may also like to read: Which of these Reveals the Most About a Person?
4. Wearing clothes that feel like you
You don’t need a full makeover or brand new closet. Sometimes it’s just wearing your favorite hoodie you feel safe in. You may just wear that particular color that gives you energy too. The are are many options so make sure to choose what makes you feel better.
Why wearing specific clothes affect our energy and confidence? Well, our body language shifts when we feel comfortable in our outfit. It boosts us more than we realize.
Just remember though that you’re not dressing to impress. You’re wearing that set of clothes to exist with ease.
5. Talking slower when feeling nervous
Wanting to sound smart is one of the things that students try to do every time. Speed in conveying thoughts may be an indication but talking too fast steals your power.
Next time, you may try to:
- Pause.
- Breathe.
Finish your sentence fully even if your voice shakes and cracks. Let your thoughts be heard even if your hands tremble behind your back.
Being nervous is normal and it's fine. But being confident is much better. So if others are beaming with it as they talk, you can too by taking it slow, steady and impactful.
6. Having eye-contact even for just one sentence longer
When you recite, look at your teacher when you answer. If you can add conviction to the way you speak, that's better. If you're having conversation with a classmate, just naturally have eye-contact when you ask. Or if you are staring yourself in the mirror, look directly in your eyes and say, “I got this.”
Holding eye contact says:
- “I’m confident today just the way I am.”
- “I’m not hiding anything."
It's like building trust with one another and there's this one hormone in the body that is often linked with feeling good. According to Cleveland Clinic, oxytocin acts as a messenger to the brain and one of its functions include building trust. Further, it is one of a few hormones that have a positive feedback loop.
So, the next time you have a conversation with someone else, do not be discouraged to look in their eyes. Make it natural and avoid being shy. It's one step gaining the confidence you need.
Final Thought: Confidence isn't being loud. It's being consistent with certain habits.
Building confidence is not a one-step process. It is a series of consistent efforts effectively done. You don’t need to suddenly believe you’re the smartest, strongest, or most prepared in the room. You just need to believe you can keep showing up even when you feel unsure about something.
Confidence isn’t ego. It’s a relationship with yourself you build day by day in a consistent manner. Subtle, as they may seem, but they're powerful.